The Wrong Stage of Life

Or - It’s Not You It’s Me

So recent events have had me dating someone.

I will pause a minute now and let you all get over the shock.

Oh, before you do that let me add that I met him on-line.

And now I’ll give you a bit more time.

Okey dokey, back to it.

It seemed quite promising: he appeared normal, he appeared to be a nice guy, he appeared to be into me. He was also tall.

This was excellent as it meant I could wear the ridiculously high shoes (11.5 cm/ 4 inches) I had foolishly bought in several bouts of excitement at the fact that someone stocks shoes that fit my clown feet. (That’d be a 10.5, or sometimes an 11, or a European 42. For the record I don’t think they make bigger shoes . . . for women.)

The ones pictured are when I really lost control. These are about 5.5 inches high. I mean, how does one walk in them? And do I really want to be almost 6 foot? I was tempted to buy them because the store was having a sale. They had reduced some other shoes by over $100 and for an extra $3 I could grab another pair. So I grabbed these. I’ve worn them once. Still, if I didn’t make foolish decisions when it came to footwear I wouldn’t be female.

But I digress- back to the bloke.

So, we dated for about two months. We had a serious discussion about what we were both looking for. I was looking for a relationship, and so was he. I think. He had 3 kids: twin six year olds and a four year old. I said I was OK with that - I knew from the beginning. And I was willing to throw my hat into the ring and take them all on. (See how badly I want to be in a relationship? Pathetic really.)

He was concerned I might be “really” old by the time his youngest grew up. What could I say? I was older than him. I just told him that I knew his kids would be a big part of his life - and mine if we got that far.  He worried that I wasn’t ‘at that stage of life.’ 

Anyway, it all seemed good. Then I went away for 8 days on a pre-planned trip to Bali with a girlfriend. (Bali is nice and the Balinese very easy going people but it is full of Aussie tourists.)

Whilst away I bought this very cool statue and thought it’d look good in the relationship corner of my bedroom. No harm tapping into some Feng Shui I figured.

Obviously I didn’t buy it soon enough. When I got back and text him to see when he wanted to catch up, he didn’t.

He said that he enjoyed my company but didn’t think we were at the same stage of life and that taking it to ‘the next level’ would be a mistake. Besides, he didn’t miss me as much as he thought he would when I was away.

Great. So, I have eaten the Easter egg I bought him - and very nice it was too. And given away the little gift I’d bought him, and the trinkets I’d bought his kids, to friends who are more deserving.

I’m not that cut up about it so I guess it was for the best anyway. Still, you’d think he could figure these things out before I started to invest in the relationship; if you need someone much younger than me, say that, don’t tell me my age doesn’t matter.

Anyway, far from being devastated I have jumped back on-line, must’ve mended my heart with copious amounts of chocolate.